Distance
by Infinite Devil Machine
Summary: All his life, Cloud Strife had tried to keep his distance. [CloTi, Oneshot]


This was also randomly inspired. I was listening to music and this popped into my head out of the blue. I only went through typing this up to keep people busy between updates of Taken. (Yes, I'm getting around to it XD ) Hope ya'll enjoy it.

**Disclaimer: **Me no own, you no sue.

For most of his life, Cloud Strife had tried to keep his distance. From everyone. He had learned that it was the only way the people he cared about wouldn't get hurt. It was hard for him, but it was the only way. He kept all of his feelings locked away inside. Away from everything. Even Tifa. _Especially _Tifa. Deep down, Cloud knew he loved her, but he could never tell her that. And he could tell that she knew he was keeping something from her. He could see the hurt in her eyes that she tried _so hard _to hide from him. But he saw it. Entirely too often if you asked him. So he grew even more distant. All for her. Because he didn't want to hurt her.

And the more distant he grew, the more Tifa would long for him to be close to her. But she would never tell him. She'd never have the courage to. And even if she did, she'd probably only scare him further away. Tifa didn't think she could handle that. It was all she could stand to not just throw her arms around his neck and kiss all his fears away. All the pains of his past. But she didn't. He had made it painfully clear that he didn't_ want_ her close to him. So she kept her feelings to herself.

And then, one day, it happened. She woke up, and he was gone. And she couldn't even cry. Oh, she wanted to. She wanted to shut the entire world out and cry until there was nothing left. But she didn't. She had a bar to open, and two children to take care of. And if they saw her crying, they would ask why. In all actuality, she didn't have an answer for them. Because she honestly didn't know. She didn't know _why _she loved the man so much. He had done everything humanly possible to keep her away. And she _still_ longed for him. She frowned slightly at herself. She was pathetic. Why couldn't she have just left him alone? He might have even stayed if she hadn't annoyed him into leaving. Despite her best efforts, her eyes sparkled with tears.

After much internal debate, Cloud decided he'd go to the church. He had lived with Tifa for a long time, be he couldn't rely on her anymore. Times were tough, and it was all Tifa could do to get her little 'family' by. She didn't need the extra burden he added. So he left. It was his only option. He had planned to leave a lot sooner than he had, but he just couldn't bring himself to. Every time he would try to tell her, he we see that look in her eyes, and he knew he couldn't. So he gave her that cocky little half smile of his and told her it was nothing. That everything was okay. He hated lying to her. But the truth would only hurt her more.

It didn't take him long to figure out that he wasn't going to be able to say goodbye. So one night, after a particularly bad nightmare... He shook his head. It was no nightmare, it was a memory. Another horrible part of his past where he had been too weak to keep his promises. Too weak to protect the ones he loved. In the middle of the night, he had left. Without looking back. Tifa didn't want him there. He winced inwardly at the fact. He had failed her too. And this only reaffirmed that his decision had been the right one. He felt a bizarre swirl of emotions rising. He pushed them away. All his life, emotions had only caused him pain. They were a weakness. Something he chose to do without.

It had been almost three weeks since Cloud had left Tifa. She realized sadly that he wasn't going to come back. She swallowed hard, pushing back the tears again. She had tried to make his life better, to bring the glint of happiness back into his eyes. She had tried, and she had failed. Miserably. In the end, she had only caused him more pain, until finally, he had left. Thinking back now, she was surprised he had stayed as long as he did.

Tifa had tried, _really tried_ to help him. To lead him back out of the darkness that threatened to overcome him. Now, he was farther in than ever before. And it was all her fault. Finally, Tifa sank to her knees and cried.


End file.
